Sometimes the biggest challenge in life lies not in finding out who we are. It lies in embracing ourselves. Fully.

This is especially true when it comes to transitioning: A process which requires getting to know our talents. Using them. Applying them. Consciously.

But when we meet our talents for the first time, there is a real chance that we´ll reject at least one – if not all – of them. And this can lead to an inner struggle. Especially, when we believe that we need to figure things out all by ourselves.

I mean, who should know us better than ourselves? Right?

But being open and honest with ourselves is not an easy task. However, owning up to this inner struggle is quintessential when it comes to successful transitioning.

Let me share the following story with you. 

I once worked with a client who was struggling with coming to terms with one of their talents. In their case, it was their talent “adaptability.”

During one of our coaching sessions, we looked at “adaptability” and explored how they were living this talent of theirs. Everything seemed to be going smoothly. In fact, my client was happily sharing stories and examples on how “adaptability” was really them.

The following week, we started the session by reflecting on the challenges my client had encountered since our last meeting. And there were a few.

Suddenly, out of the blue, my client gave me a serious look: “Adaptability. It´s not me!” My client was clearly in a lot of pain. Feeling distraught that they could not connect with one of their talents. So, we slowed the process down and put “adaptability” to one side.

We then turned to how my client had celebrated one of their wins that week. And funnily enough, “adaptabilty” resurfaced.

“How” you may wonder?

My client had decided to treat themselves to a new pair of jeans. While they were trying on the jeans, they noticed that their usual size didn’t fit. So, they asked the shop assistant for a bigger size.

Hearing this, I asked my client how they had felt when they had to ask for a bigger size. Their answer? “No biggie. It was simply a matter of asking.”

To ensure that I heard and understood my client correctly, I asked: “So you simply – and without much thought – just asked for the bigger size?” “Yes,” they answered. Looking a little confused.

“So, you adapted to the new situation?” I checked.

When the penny had dropped, my client couldn´t stop laughing. They were hit by the sudden realization that “adaptability” was indeed a talent of theirs.

Up to that point, my client had been convinced that everyone would have handled the situation in exactly the same way as they had done. They thought that “adaptability” came as naturally to everyone as it did to them. No feelings of fear, shame or discomfort attached to asking for a bigger size.

Due to this conviction, my client was totally unaware of the impact “adaptability” was having on their everyday life.

Embracing your talents doesn´t come easy. They´re so much part of you that you take them for granted. Totally unaware of their uniqueness.

Your talents shape and form your everyday decisions. So it´s crucial to get to know them and acknowledge them. Using them consciously in creating the life you want to live.

When was the last time you embraced your talents and discovered your inner strength?


photo: fotolia/VanHope